#TDTT - Tantrum during the Taper
Forget TBT because for many of us right now with spring Marathons / Ultras, TDTT will be trending. Tantrums during the taper period before a race should be a clinically diagnosed condition because; the symptoms are very real, it affects the majority of us and it really is a life altering alignment. Over the past two weeks I have had an extreme case of TDTT so I want to share some of the common symptoms and give you the good news that you are not alone. I also want to give you some bad news, there is little you can do about it as chances are it will happen to you and be the hardest weeks of your training plan. BUT please have faith, trust in the process and you will emerge out the other side like a coiled spring ready to race.
I have been as honest as possible here, so what do the symptoms of TDTT look like…
Firstly - aches, pains, injuries, ouchies. During my outbreak of TDTT I have diagnosed myself (google diagnosed me, E you foolish girl!) with a tibial stress fracture, posterior shin splints, a ruptured calf, slipped disk, ankle strains and even (today) a hairline wrist fracture. Yes I really did manage to convince myself that an old wrist fracture had reared its head because I’ve been wearing my Suunto too much. Now if that doesn’t sound completely bonkers, I don’t know what does.
The moral of the story for all of these ailments is that when you stop running and start allowing your body to recover, combined with having more time to think about things, then your body starts to moan and groan. Nothing is wrong with me apart from the fact that I have run many miles in preparation for this race so obviously things will ache. Don’t diagnose yourself, but instead treat yourself to a couple of sports massages to iron out the creases and get in the bath whenever you can. Your body is a well conditioned machine, you just need to let it heal and TRUST THE PROCESS that it will be ready for race day.
Secondly - If the fake pains aren’t enough to convince you that you will never run a 5km again never mind your 50 mile race, then the fact that you are fatigued beyond comprehension will leave you bed riddled at every spare opportunity. During my first taper week I ran the grand total of 22 km which is less than any other week since January when I had flu and then since June 2018 when I was on cycle tour. I also had an average of 8.5 hours sleep each night with at least one hour of napping after school on weekdays and at least 2 one hour naps each day of the weekend.
Chronic fatigue to the point of blurry vision, the need to use the handrail when climbing stairs, an inability to stay awake past 10pm is debilitating. I’m so lucky with being able to go to bed early without having to worry about children or pets, but if you can’t then, I advise you all in the taper to grab sleep when you can, and use the extra time that you would have been running to nap / get to bed early. Sleep is the most efficient healer and tool for recovery we have at our disposal, and it’s free, so use it and TRUST THE PROCESS that sleep will get your body race ready.
Thirdly - Although you will be doing less of your chosen sport of long distance running, be ready for the fact that you are about to become an elite athlete in the sport of Ultra-Eating. In the first 4 days of the taper I ate 750g of peanut butter. That’s 4500 calories on peanut butter alone. That is nearly my BMR (basal metabolic rate) each day on just peanut butter. If I’m on honest, it didn’t even touch the sides. I was a bottomless pit during that first week and if it was in the flat, I pretty much ate it. Go with it folks.
For some of us (me!) it is scary to just let your body continually feed, as it feels completely out of control. But try to avoid freaking out, your body is crying out for fuel after the hard miles you’ve put in. You will not recovery until you provide your muscles with the nutrients to repair, and not eating will actually just prolong the feelings of mystery aches and of fatigue as mentioned above. Ride it out, wear looser clothes to avoid feeling like the michelin man (other fat mascots available) and TRUST THE PROCESS.
A fourth symptom - This goes hand in hand with the Ultra Eating and I call it ‘ The Great carb swellathon’. Whenever I look at photos of myself just before a marathon my face always has that round puffy look to it, and that’s the extra water I’m retaining from having eaten enough to fuel my race. Right now I am well and truly participating in The Great carb swellathon with puffy little cheeks, eyes and fingers (I think I’m only noticing my fingers this time because I now wear a ring so it feels tighter than normal).
If I was to weigh myself (which I won’t because that shit hurts my mind) then I would expect to be around 2kg heavier due to the increased water retention that is a byproduct of eating more carbs. Post race expect to still be retaining water for a couple of days until your body gets back into its own equilibrium. Race day is a massive trauma on your body so it will try and hold onto as much nutrients as possible for a few days after. But within a week you’ll be back to normal. Ride it out folks, avoid selfies if it’s going to make you feel like Mr Blobby and TRUST THE PROCESS.
Lastly - a symptom that has a way of rearing its head in different ways but it helps if you think of it like grief. Whilst this is all very dramatic, during the taper we have essentially lost part of our daily routine that has become an internalised component of who we are. We won’t be running as much and therefore we are grieving the loss of our daily dose of adventure / challenge and purpose. For some of us this grief will come out as withdrawal and becoming reclusive. Others experience this grief by being angry, negative and living everyday leading up to race day a shit storm of pessimism. Others will go through the grief by becoming more needy and requiring a lot more attention and reassurance.
I have at times during the TDTT outbreak touched on all three of these. I have posted a lot less on social media, mainly due to feeling unworthy and boring. I have been even more of a Diva and then at other times I have just required a big warm all embracing hug. Talk about high maintenance, BUT if you ask for help it will be there for you. Non-runners won’t understand the frustration you’re in, but that’s ok you will make it through, because afterall time will pass, your race will come and it’s all part of our wonderful sport.
During these two weeks Jeremy has taken to calling me ‘the little baby’ because my needs really have regressed to that of an infant; sleep, eat, cry and in need of constant hugs. TDTT is a nasty condition and something that until you’ve been through it and raced well at the other end feels like a life sentence.
The biggest tool at your disposal is you mindset during the taper. Unfortunately in the great paradigm that is life, our mindset is also our biggest enemy during the taper. It is your mind that dictates the aches you feel, the sleep you have, the feelings over eating more, your self image, the confidence you have in your abilities and the way in which you ask for help. However it is also our minds that has the power to overcome all of these things. Unfortunately it is grossly under trained in many of us (including me who has a MSc in Sport Psychology) and that is why TDTT has riddled me silly. I’m hoping that even by reading this it acts as a small piece of reassurance to your mind that all will be ok and that you aren’t broken, or lazy, or fat, or slow or incapable. You are just recovering.
I won’t lie, I have struggled. Really struggled over the past two weeks. I’ve vouched to never put myself through it again. However let’s be real I know once I get to that start line on Saturday morning and step out onto the trails and then cross the finish line I’ll be itching to do it all over again.